Microsoft Desperately Scrambles to Figure Out a Way to Power Tech Nobody Asked For

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Microsoft, founded in 1975, rushing to the death of its operating system with more bloat than me after a gallon of water and salty French fries, and also making sure we never have a winter with snow, ever again. It’s a tale as old as time: Plucky young lad builds a computer in Daddy’s garage, and then forty years later decides to be a supervillain, holding the entire world hostage demanding that his graphics card farms receive more power, or he’ll shoot the icecaps in the face.

Do you remember back when you didn’t have to have an air conditioner running in March? Oh, those were the days, two years ago.

I feel like this is the only thing I’m writing about. I’m not really working on my book, I’m not really putting anything new into my Second Life store. A lot of that is largely due to the fact that I have a day job, and it tires me out. Constantly. But I do happen to view social media a lot, and because of that, I’m forced to watch as corporations push the world further and further into destruction … for practically no reason.

Microsoft’s emissions have spiked nearly thirty percent since the beginning of the pandemic. A massive heel-turn after the world decided it was going to work toward lowering emissions. You know, so we can stop melting to death every single summer, and not die in 2040.

In the article linked in the previous paragraph, Microsoft laments that the world, and they themselves, aren’t meeting climate goals, and are facing “new challenges” as technology evolves.

The problem, is that the technology they’re talking about, is AI. If you’ve been reading what I write, pretty much daily, or sometimes even multiple times a day, you know how I feel about AI. Useless learning machines that plagiarize and generate slop that untalented people call “art.”

You might have seen, numerous times, over and over, as brands make posts on various social media websites and apps about image generation, or their new AI features (see: Mozilla and DuckDuckGo), and the response is always profoundly negative. Once you’ve seen it so many times, you start to think, “Hey, does anyone actually want this?”

I mean, aside from the small percentage of people who have no genuine fulfillment from any other source, and therefore resort to using theft machines to make themselves feel good—who asked for this?

Why does Microsoft need to build new nuclear power plants to cool their data centers … for technology that seemingly nobody actually wants!?

It’s no surprise that most brands on social media have mastered the art of utterly ignoring any and all negative feedback to their decisions that they gladly share, without shame. Aside from, I guess, maybe Apple in regard to their ridiculous crushing press commercial.

But, I wanted to pose the question to these corporations that seem to be racing to the extinction of all humanity on the backs of artists and writers—stolen work and stolen words: Why? What is this revolutionizing? Did every single billionaire have an especially annoying college professor who scolded them for plagiarizing their essays, that they feel the collapse of Earth’s climate is worth their revenge?

”We’re struggling to meet our climate demands amid new technologies!”

Then stop. It’s literally that easy. We could be working toward feeding the poor and housing the homeless, and replanting forests. Instead, we’re stuffing cash into Nvidia’s pockets so we can build data center farms for fake photos of Jesus holding dolphins with 18 fingers on each hand.

The world has become a parody of itself.